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[from the desk of Stickboy]

Good afternoon, mes amis!

It’s hotter than a sinus out there, kinder, but hereat Camp Pretty Sure I’ve been availing myself of the air-conditioned splendor of the arts and crafts cabin, slaving away at this current collection of singles, our first in half a decade (and what a frigging decade it’s been). While the other campers are preparing for their Series 7 exam, I’ve been bent over a ream of recycled white paper, drafting my bitter heart out.

Our second collection of singles, B-sides, broadsides, and wobbling, hideous mutant individual square-strips, “The 2007 Pretty Sure Summertime Singles Collection,” is now available, lurching at you from your monitor like some sort of drive-in movie monster. Click here for the kind of instant gratification not even an ATM can provide:

As always, in paper –

http://www.oliosonline.org/Olios/stickboy/singles2007/summertime_singles.pdf

or plastic -

http://www.oliosonline.org/Olios/stickboy/singles2007/stickboy_summertime_singles.html

Print ‘em and pass ‘em around the office, staple them over the Dilbert comics tacked up on the bulletin board in the office kitchen. Viva la revolucion! La lutte continue!

In other thrilling news, legendary strips “Destroy Your Life” and “En El Fondo” are now available at www.oliosonline.org, thanks to the diligence and fortitude of my editor, Handsome Steve Wiley.

Merchandise? You betcha! Buy stuff now, before it’s only available in MP3 format (and many thanks, again and again, to the brilliant and beautiful Bethany Schadel-Kenny, for her efforts on our commercial behalf) –

http://www.cafepress.com/sticky_tbs

Visit Bethany’s site - www.jkdesignpartners.com

Look for new merchandise this fall, aprons and condoms and spatulas and stuff. Bongs. An anvil, I think, and a line of anhydrous engines.

The current edition of Olios features “Branko's Bosnia: Tracing the Steps of a Refugee and Prijatelj,” by Steven Mayers, and the usual trenchant commentary of Jeff Myhre -

www.oliosonline.org

As a wee lad, I spent my summers in Flanders, a little town in the hill country of western New Jersey, at a day camp run by the YM-YWHA (yes, that’s the Young Men’s, Young Women’s Hebrew Association). Our days were spent playing soccer, taking swimming lessons or learning how to help effect the imminent Zionist takeover of the entire world, and one night each summer all campers of a certain age enjoyed an actual sleepover, replete with an extra round of dodge ball (we called it bombardment, because we’re Jews and that’s how it felt), an evening swim and a cookout. The highlight of the swim was its greased pig portion, when the counselors would render a watermelon slick with a coat of Vaseline and roll it into the pool, wherein about 50 prepubescent Jewish kids would try to force it out of the pool and back onto the pooling concrete. And they say I’m creepy.

Can’t you see Dick Cheney smearing the entire naked body of Scooter Libby with Vaseline? “Don’t worry, Scoot, those fucking fuckers won’t be able to get ahold of you – you’ll slip right through!” The problem is, we’re not talking about canoeing and badminton, we’re talking about the obstruction of an investigation into a treasonous act. Treason. And you thought Clinton’s January 2001 pardons were a disembowelment of Federal justice.

Fuck it, I love freedom! If you love freedom (and if you’re reading Pretty Sure, you’d better fucking love it), visit this site (you can rent the DVD from Netflix) -

http://www.truthuncovered.com/

It quite simply unpacks the Bush Administration’s barefaced lies about the invasion. It’s like watching yourself sunburn.

In August we’re paying homage to classic drive-in movies – look for “Stickboy vs. Dogbert,” “Night of the Chief Executive Officers,” and “Iacocca, Iacocca, Iacocca!” Until then, I’ll see you somewhere on the burning shore of the Atlantic, somewhere between Beaches Long and Bradley. I’ll be the guy who forgot his umbrella, his sunscreen and a bottle of water. I will, however, be wearing a black Speedo with the following warning emblazoned across the crotch in incredibly legible white letters:

“Careful! The Stickboy You Are About to Enjoy is Extremely Hot!”

The hottest! As you well know…

Beso,
Stick

 

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